Tell the Truth Without Blame or Judgment

If you haven’t had a chance to read Angeles Arrien’s book, The Four-fold Way, I would encourage you to do so.  There is a great deal of wisdom in her four straightforward principles:

Show up and choose to be present.

Speak to what has heart and meaning.

Tell the truth without blame or judgment.

Be open to outcome, not attached to it.

Arrien was a cultural anthropologist who studied and shared many cultural insights until her death in April of 2104.  She spoke to the importance of the four principles above.

When we consider why it can be so challenging to put our best foot forward, I believe that many times we are somewhat paralyzed by the blame and judgment we have rained down on us by others.  While the truth is important and we need to consider the input and feedback from others with different vantage points, we do not need to feel judged or blamed because our opinion is different.  Understanding that the situation we are in is at least slightly different than anything previously experienced by another, allows us to accept advice without accepting mandates for certain behavior.  Knowing you have made good decisions in the past, and after getting truthful observations and opinions from others, you will make other good decisions, allow us to take our next steps with confidence and understanding what it means to truly put our “best foot forward.” 

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